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Rating: three stars out of five


Type: English tea room

Kids menu: No

Ambience: Novelty dining within a charming house built in 1687

Quality of food: fair

Comfort: wooden chairs and tables very close together

Service: Meals arrived quickly, service not as charming as the place

Warning: No toilets, only cash accepted

Website: http://www.crooked-house.com/

The bill: £25.80

The Crooked House of Windsor serves up a scrumptious dollop of genuine old English charm. I found it a novel experience and the perfect place to rendezvous for traditional cream teas served in tiered vintage china plates within a typical delicate English surround. It’s a quaint understated spot and worth a visit – even if it’s only to momentarily savour a glimpse of yesteryear.

With kids in tow it’s not ideal for younger tots. There are only a handful of tables in the small tea room – set over two floors – and they’re so close together that conversation is an exchange of brief whispers. My daughter munched on a baked potato filled with roast chicken and bacon with avocado pear and salad on the side. It was well presented but the chicken was cold and it came with a long strand of human hair!

The cappuccinos are delicious, but be warned – the cups are the size of mini swimming pools. I had a gorgeous bowl of carrot and coriander soup and my other half munched on a tasty sausage and coleslaw baguette.

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